not quite a virgin

Here goes, my first post in my shiny new blog. Had one before, but it's been a while, and I wasn't sure I liked knowing who all was reading it, so this one is anonymous. I enjoy reading anonymous blogs-- something about peeking into the lives of strangers reminds one that no, we're not alone, and yes, people are ultimately good and beautiful and worthy of love.

some random getting to know me notes, for future readers' reference: born and raised in the southeast but not necessarily typical for that area, nearly 30, female, happily married with happily no kids, do have a dog and cat. That should be enough context to make sense of anything that follows. If you're a follower of the myers-briggs personality type tests, I'm a scary INFJ.

Today I'm feeling nostalgic. Which is both normal and odd for me considering A) it's a natural part of my personality to be overly-emotional about things like changing years and B) I have the worst memory known to man. Days, months, years all blur together for me, leaving me feeling like an 8 year old in this adult body, playing house with my husband almost like I used to with my brothers, forgetting that this one life is all I get and that I had better start detailing every moment of it lest it fade and blur into one big foggy nothing. Hence the blog.

Back to the point: this has been a pretty terrible year, and it's been hard to stay content, although I must say that I won that battle. Lost two grandmothers-in-law, broken promises and dreams unfulfilled (or deferred?), fights and health scares, all the same stuff everyone goes through, just this year seemed to be heavy on the negative. But I remain content, conscious of my many blessings, and solid in my belief that life, though sucky at times, is worth it.

Tonight there's sushi and live music in the works, looking forward to that. Had a couple friends back out on us. They're the types that are SO much fun to have around, hilarious and sweet and honest-- they must know how great they are and so they try to keep all that greatness to themselves. I can't tell you how many times we've made plans with them only for them to cancel or not show. But we keep them around because we love them no matter what and when they do come, it's worth the disappointment. I have been trying to decide if it's worth it to brave the cold to dress up all sparkly and festive tonight, but I know myself too well and will probably end up in a cardigan and jeans. I'm glad my husband loves me for me.